Wish You Could Take That Back?

Have you ever said something Have you ever said something and then immediately wished you could and then immediately wished you could and then immediately wished you could take it back? take it back? take it back? >> In 2000, Cheryl and I came to do the >> In 2000, Cheryl and I came to do the >> In 2000, Cheryl and I came to do the music here at First Assembly. I wasn't music here at First Assembly. I wasn't music here at First Assembly. I wasn't here very long and a girl came up and here very long and a girl came up and here very long and a girl came up and asked me in choir if [music] I could do asked me in choir if [music] I could do asked me in choir if [music] I could do her mother's funeral. I said, "Well, of her mother's funeral. I said, "Well, of her mother's funeral. I said, "Well, of course." So that day of the funeral, I course." So that day of the funeral, I course." So that day of the funeral, I uh did the obituary and then I got into uh did the obituary and then I got into uh did the obituary and then I got into the sermon and and I told them how Mary the sermon and and I told them how Mary the sermon and and I told them how Mary was such a wonderful woman and Mary was was such a wonderful woman and Mary was was such a wonderful woman and Mary was great and and I and then I realized great and and I and then I realized great and and I and then I realized her name wasn't Mary. So it was my first her name wasn't Mary. So it was my first her name wasn't Mary. So it was my first year on staff here at First NLR. I just year on staff here at First NLR. I just year on staff here at First NLR. I just come from seminary, Bible school, the come from seminary, Bible school, the come from seminary, Bible school, the whole academic world, and we were whole academic world, and we were whole academic world, and we were talking about Wednesday nights, and talking about Wednesday nights, and talking about Wednesday nights, and Pastor [music] Rod had just preached the Pastor [music] Rod had just preached the Pastor [music] Rod had just preached the week before. Um, and I said to my pastor week before. Um, and I said to my pastor week before. Um, and I said to my pastor and my boss, uh, your message was so and my boss, uh, your message was so and my boss, uh, your message was so simple last week, last Wednesday night, simple last week, last Wednesday night, simple last week, last Wednesday night, that I was bored. That's right. I told that I was bored. That's right. I told that I was bored. That's right. I told Pastor Rod he was boring. Pastor Brian Pastor Rod he was boring. Pastor Brian Pastor Rod he was boring. Pastor Brian quickly left the room.

quickly left the room. quickly left the room. >> The second year we did Christmas Lane, I >> The second year we did Christmas Lane, I >> The second year we did Christmas Lane, I was leading the event. It's a big was leading the event. It's a big was leading the event. It's a big outdoor event with carnival rides. We outdoor event with carnival rides. We outdoor event with carnival rides. We had put up lights on the building and uh had put up lights on the building and uh had put up lights on the building and uh the event was had just gotten started the event was had just gotten started the event was had just gotten started [music] and Pastor Rod walks up and he [music] and Pastor Rod walks up and he [music] and Pastor Rod walks up and he looks at me, he goes, "This has been looks at me, he goes, "This has been looks at me, he goes, "This has been pretty easy. Don't you think we could pretty easy. Don't you think we could pretty easy. Don't you think we could just finish putting lights around the just finish putting lights around the just finish putting lights around the building and I looked at him and I said, building and I looked at him and I said, building and I looked at him and I said, "Yes, and at 7:00 we can stop the world "Yes, and at 7:00 we can stop the world "Yes, and at 7:00 we can stop the world and make it spin the other direction." and make it spin the other direction." and make it spin the other direction." And I'll never forget the look on his And I'll never forget the look on his And I'll never forget the look on his face. He just went and he turned around and walked up the and he turned around and walked up the lane. And I remember watching the back lane. And I remember watching the back lane. And I remember watching the back of his head walk through the midst of his head walk through the midst of his head walk through the midst [music] of the people and thinking, "Did [music] of the people and thinking, "Did [music] of the people and thinking, "Did those words just come out of my mouth?" those words just come out of my mouth?" those words just come out of my mouth?" "Yes, they did. What do I do now?" "Yes, they did. What do I do now?" "Yes, they did. What do I do now?" >> We've all been there. In a split second, >> We've all been there. In a split second, >> We've all been there. In a split second, words come out that you realize you words come out that you realize you words come out that you realize you should have kept to yourself. But once should have kept to yourself. But once should have kept to yourself. But once they're spoken, you can't pull them they're spoken, you can't pull them they're spoken, you can't pull them back.

back. back. You don't do it on purpose. You don't You don't do it on purpose. You don't You don't do it on purpose. You don't plan to lose your temper. plan to lose your temper. plan to lose your temper. Nobody wakes up in the morning and Nobody wakes up in the morning and Nobody wakes up in the morning and thinks, "Today I'm going to damage a thinks, "Today I'm going to damage a thinks, "Today I'm going to damage a relationship." relationship." relationship." No one schedules an outburst. No one schedules an outburst. No one schedules an outburst. You don't intend to say something you'll You don't intend to say something you'll You don't intend to say something you'll regret by dinner. regret by dinner. regret by dinner. It just happens. You're tired. You're It just happens. You're tired. You're It just happens. You're tired. You're under pressure. Someone misunderstands under pressure. Someone misunderstands under pressure. Someone misunderstands you. A conversation goes the wrong you. A conversation goes the wrong you. A conversation goes the wrong direction. An email feels like an direction. An email feels like an direction. An email feels like an attack. attack. attack. A tone feels disrespectful. A tone feels disrespectful. A tone feels disrespectful. Maybe a situation feels unfair. Maybe a situation feels unfair. Maybe a situation feels unfair. Before you know it, something rises up Before you know it, something rises up Before you know it, something rises up in you faster than wisdom can catch it. in you faster than wisdom can catch it. in you faster than wisdom can catch it. Words come out quicker than you mean. Words come out quicker than you mean. Words come out quicker than you mean. volume increases, volume increases, volume increases, patience disappears, and you say patience disappears, and you say patience disappears, and you say something you later you regret. something you later you regret. something you later you regret. Later, sometimes moments later, you Later, sometimes moments later, you Later, sometimes moments later, you think, "Why did I say that?

think, "Why did I say that? think, "Why did I say that? Why in the world did I react that way? Why in the world did I react that way? Why in the world did I react that way? What was I thinking?" You lay in bed and What was I thinking?" You lay in bed and What was I thinking?" You lay in bed and think about what you should have said, think about what you should have said, think about what you should have said, how you should have responded. Today, how you should have responded. Today, how you should have responded. Today, we're going to learn a three-step we're going to learn a three-step we're going to learn a three-step formula from scripture that if followed, formula from scripture that if followed, formula from scripture that if followed, will help you avoid those moments. It's will help you avoid those moments. It's will help you avoid those moments. It's easy to remember, but often challenging easy to remember, but often challenging easy to remember, but often challenging to implement. Before we get to the to implement. Before we get to the to implement. Before we get to the formula, let me set the stage. formula, let me set the stage. formula, let me set the stage. James wrote a letter to believers who James wrote a letter to believers who James wrote a letter to believers who are living under pressure, persecuted, are living under pressure, persecuted, are living under pressure, persecuted, scattered, misunderstood, facing scattered, misunderstood, facing scattered, misunderstood, facing hardship. We call that letter the book hardship. We call that letter the book hardship. We call that letter the book of James. The readers of this letter had of James. The readers of this letter had of James. The readers of this letter had good reason to be angry and reactive. good reason to be angry and reactive. good reason to be angry and reactive. But James didn't tell them how to win But James didn't tell them how to win But James didn't tell them how to win arguments, seize power, or assert arguments, seize power, or assert arguments, seize power, or assert themselves. themselves. themselves. Instead, he told them how to respond in Instead, he told them how to respond in Instead, he told them how to respond in a way that represents Jesus well. a way that represents Jesus well. a way that represents Jesus well. People are watching to see how you react People are watching to see how you react People are watching to see how you react when the pressure's on. When you're when the pressure's on. When you're when the pressure's on. When you're unjustly accused or unfairly blamed, it unjustly accused or unfairly blamed, it unjustly accused or unfairly blamed, it feels like you're getting hit from all feels like you're getting hit from all feels like you're getting hit from all sides. In those moments, you need faith sides. In those moments, you need faith sides. In those moments, you need faith that works. Faith that's lived out, that works. Faith that's lived out, that works. Faith that's lived out, demonstrated, and seen.

demonstrated, and seen. demonstrated, and seen. James gave three instructions that sound James gave three instructions that sound James gave three instructions that sound simple, but requires self-discipline and simple, but requires self-discipline and simple, but requires self-discipline and a spirit controlled temperament. The a spirit controlled temperament. The a spirit controlled temperament. The overall theme of his teaching is that overall theme of his teaching is that overall theme of his teaching is that spiritual maturity is not measured by spiritual maturity is not measured by spiritual maturity is not measured by how loud you are, but by how controlled how loud you are, but by how controlled how loud you are, but by how controlled you are. you are. you are. James chapter 1 verse 19. My dear James chapter 1 verse 19. My dear James chapter 1 verse 19. My dear brothers, take note of this. Everyone brothers, take note of this. Everyone brothers, take note of this. Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to should be quick to listen, slow to should be quick to listen, slow to speak, speak, speak, and slow to become angry. and slow to become angry. and slow to become angry. If you master those three steps, it will If you master those three steps, it will If you master those three steps, it will change your marriage, your relationships change your marriage, your relationships change your marriage, your relationships at work, your friendships, and your at work, your friendships, and your at work, your friendships, and your witness. We are going to slow down and witness. We are going to slow down and witness. We are going to slow down and take a closer look at how to respond to take a closer look at how to respond to take a closer look at how to respond to pressure, insults, accusations, hostile pressure, insults, accusations, hostile pressure, insults, accusations, hostile words, and angry people in a way that words, and angry people in a way that words, and angry people in a way that pleases God. My dear brothers, take note pleases God. My dear brothers, take note pleases God. My dear brothers, take note of this. Everyone should. And I want to of this. Everyone should. And I want to of this. Everyone should. And I want to pause right there because this is pause right there because this is pause right there because this is important. These instructions are not important. These instructions are not important. These instructions are not just for superchristians.

just for superchristians. just for superchristians. It's not just for people who've been It's not just for people who've been It's not just for people who've been believers for 20 years, who people who believers for 20 years, who people who believers for 20 years, who people who already have incredible self-discipline. already have incredible self-discipline. already have incredible self-discipline. This approach is for everyone. This approach is for everyone. This approach is for everyone. Whether you've been in church all your Whether you've been in church all your Whether you've been in church all your life or this is your third weekend. In life or this is your third weekend. In life or this is your third weekend. In fact, even if you're not a follower of fact, even if you're not a follower of fact, even if you're not a follower of Jesus, this formula works. Jesus, this formula works. Jesus, this formula works. James said, "Everyone should be quick to James said, "Everyone should be quick to James said, "Everyone should be quick to listen." listen." listen." If you're married or you have kids, at If you're married or you have kids, at If you're married or you have kids, at one time or another, this conversation one time or another, this conversation one time or another, this conversation has happened in your home. has happened in your home. has happened in your home. You're not listening to me. Yes, I am. I You're not listening to me. Yes, I am. I You're not listening to me. Yes, I am. I heard every word you said. You did not. heard every word you said. You did not. heard every word you said. You did not. You are focused on the game or your You are focused on the game or your You are focused on the game or your focus on your phone. Put that down and focus on your phone. Put that down and focus on your phone. Put that down and listen. listen. listen. Most people think communication begins Most people think communication begins Most people think communication begins with speaking. According to James, it with speaking. According to James, it with speaking. According to James, it begins with listening. begins with listening. begins with listening. Listening is more than just hearing Listening is more than just hearing Listening is more than just hearing words. words. words. Listening is slowing down long enough to Listening is slowing down long enough to Listening is slowing down long enough to understand.

understand. understand. Listening communicates value. What you Listening communicates value. What you Listening communicates value. What you say matters and you matter and it opens say matters and you matter and it opens say matters and you matter and it opens the door to deeper relationships. James the door to deeper relationships. James the door to deeper relationships. James says you should be quick to listen, says you should be quick to listen, says you should be quick to listen, eager, ready, open. We live in one of eager, ready, open. We live in one of eager, ready, open. We live in one of the noisiest times in human history. the noisiest times in human history. the noisiest times in human history. 24-hour news cycles, 24-hour news cycles, 24-hour news cycles, constant notifications on your phone, constant notifications on your phone, constant notifications on your phone, endless commentary and opinions, endless commentary and opinions, endless commentary and opinions, loud, angry social media arguments based loud, angry social media arguments based loud, angry social media arguments based on emotion instead of facts. You are on emotion instead of facts. You are on emotion instead of facts. You are constantly surrounded by noise. People constantly surrounded by noise. People constantly surrounded by noise. People are talking all the time. are talking all the time. are talking all the time. But listening has become a lost art. But listening has become a lost art. But listening has become a lost art. Conversation has been replaced with Conversation has been replaced with Conversation has been replaced with competition. competition. competition. Studies in communication show that Studies in communication show that Studies in communication show that people retain only a small percentage of people retain only a small percentage of people retain only a small percentage of what they hear in a conversation because what they hear in a conversation because what they hear in a conversation because they're mentally preparing their they're mentally preparing their they're mentally preparing their response while the other person's response while the other person's response while the other person's talking.

talking. talking. Instead of listening to understand, Instead of listening to understand, Instead of listening to understand, people wait for their turn to speak a people wait for their turn to speak a people wait for their turn to speak a gap so they can insert their opinion. If gap so they can insert their opinion. If gap so they can insert their opinion. If there's not a gap, they just interrupt. there's not a gap, they just interrupt. there's not a gap, they just interrupt. Sometimes interrupt, it's not even on Sometimes interrupt, it's not even on Sometimes interrupt, it's not even on topic. Have you watched any recent presidential Have you watched any recent presidential debate? That is the best example of how not to That is the best example of how not to have a conversation. have a conversation. have a conversation. One person talks while the other person One person talks while the other person One person talks while the other person talks over them. They both talk, but not talks over them. They both talk, but not talks over them. They both talk, but not to each other. They're just making to each other. They're just making to each other. They're just making points they want to make while points they want to make while points they want to make while completely ignoring the questions. completely ignoring the questions. completely ignoring the questions. You see it in politics, You see it in politics, You see it in politics, social media, in families, social media, in families, social media, in families, sadly even in churches. People talk but sadly even in churches. People talk but sadly even in churches. People talk but no one actually listens. no one actually listens. no one actually listens. Sadly, when listening disappears, Sadly, when listening disappears, Sadly, when listening disappears, relationships suffer. relationships suffer. relationships suffer. Imagine you go to the doctor because Imagine you go to the doctor because Imagine you go to the doctor because something feels seriously wrong. And something feels seriously wrong. And something feels seriously wrong. And after waiting in the waiting room and after waiting in the waiting room and after waiting in the waiting room and then waiting in the holding area and then waiting in the holding area and then waiting in the holding area and then waiting in the patient room, the then waiting in the patient room, the then waiting in the patient room, the doctor walks in.

doctor walks in. doctor walks in. He sits down. He sits down. He sits down. You start explaining, "Doc, I'm I'm You start explaining, "Doc, I'm I'm You start explaining, "Doc, I'm I'm really afraid something seriously wrong. really afraid something seriously wrong. really afraid something seriously wrong. It started about three weeks ago. I'm It started about three weeks ago. I'm It started about three weeks ago. I'm dizzy and I I can't see." And before you dizzy and I I can't see." And before you dizzy and I I can't see." And before you even finish explaining your symptoms, even finish explaining your symptoms, even finish explaining your symptoms, the doctor interrupts, writes a the doctor interrupts, writes a the doctor interrupts, writes a prescription, and walks out. prescription, and walks out. prescription, and walks out. You would leave thinking, "He didn't You would leave thinking, "He didn't You would leave thinking, "He didn't even listen to me." And you would even listen to me." And you would even listen to me." And you would question the diagnosis question the diagnosis question the diagnosis because he never heard the full story. A because he never heard the full story. A because he never heard the full story. A good doctor knows a diagnosis begins good doctor knows a diagnosis begins good doctor knows a diagnosis begins with listening. If they don't, they with listening. If they don't, they with listening. If they don't, they might treat the wrong problem. might treat the wrong problem. might treat the wrong problem. The same thing happens in relationships. The same thing happens in relationships. The same thing happens in relationships. If you don't listen, you often come to If you don't listen, you often come to If you don't listen, you often come to the wrong conclusion. the wrong conclusion. the wrong conclusion. Listening is how you understand. If you Listening is how you understand. If you Listening is how you understand. If you don't listen, you will misunderstand. don't listen, you will misunderstand. don't listen, you will misunderstand. If you misunderstand, you will overreact If you misunderstand, you will overreact If you misunderstand, you will overreact to things that weren't even said.

to things that weren't even said. to things that weren't even said. So listening is where healthy So listening is where healthy So listening is where healthy communication begins. Listen to the communication begins. Listen to the communication begins. Listen to the needs and hurts of people you're tempted needs and hurts of people you're tempted needs and hurts of people you're tempted to be angry with. to be angry with. to be angry with. An obnoxious, irritating person is often An obnoxious, irritating person is often An obnoxious, irritating person is often a person with a deep need. They're a person with a deep need. They're a person with a deep need. They're wanting to be loved and needing wanting to be loved and needing wanting to be loved and needing attention. Listen for the real need. attention. Listen for the real need. attention. Listen for the real need. Listen to the person. Listen to the Holy Listen to the person. Listen to the Holy Listen to the person. Listen to the Holy Spirit. When you're in a difficult Spirit. When you're in a difficult Spirit. When you're in a difficult conversation, ask God to help you conversation, ask God to help you conversation, ask God to help you understand where the other person's understand where the other person's understand where the other person's coming from. coming from. coming from. Tuning into the Holy Spirit will help Tuning into the Holy Spirit will help Tuning into the Holy Spirit will help shift your perspective away from shift your perspective away from shift your perspective away from yourself yourself yourself and might even change an angry moment and might even change an angry moment and might even change an angry moment into a divine appointment. into a divine appointment. into a divine appointment. Listening is only the first step. You Listening is only the first step. You Listening is only the first step. You can listen patiently but respond can listen patiently but respond can listen patiently but respond harshly. harshly. harshly. You can hear the whole story and then You can hear the whole story and then You can hear the whole story and then say something that makes the situation say something that makes the situation say something that makes the situation worse. You can undo any benefit gained worse. You can undo any benefit gained worse. You can undo any benefit gained by good listening with quick careless by good listening with quick careless by good listening with quick careless words. That's why step two matters.

words. That's why step two matters. words. That's why step two matters. James said, "My dear brothers, take note James said, "My dear brothers, take note James said, "My dear brothers, take note of this. Everyone should be quick to of this. Everyone should be quick to of this. Everyone should be quick to listen and slow to speak." listen and slow to speak." listen and slow to speak." I'm not sure which of the two is more I'm not sure which of the two is more I'm not sure which of the two is more difficult, but they are connected. If difficult, but they are connected. If difficult, but they are connected. If you are quick to listen, that helps you you are quick to listen, that helps you you are quick to listen, that helps you be slower to speak. be slower to speak. be slower to speak. Most of the words I regret are words Most of the words I regret are words Most of the words I regret are words spoken quickly. spoken quickly. spoken quickly. Instead of thoughtfully considering my Instead of thoughtfully considering my Instead of thoughtfully considering my words, I give an answer that comes from words, I give an answer that comes from words, I give an answer that comes from frustration, hurry, or anger. I do much frustration, hurry, or anger. I do much frustration, hurry, or anger. I do much better if I slow down and think about better if I slow down and think about better if I slow down and think about what I want to say and how I want to say what I want to say and how I want to say what I want to say and how I want to say it. In the same way, my worst emails are it. In the same way, my worst emails are it. In the same way, my worst emails are the ones I quickly write. the ones I quickly write. the ones I quickly write. That's why send is one of the most That's why send is one of the most That's why send is one of the most dangerous buttons on your computer. dangerous buttons on your computer. dangerous buttons on your computer. Slow to speak doesn't mean you don't Slow to speak doesn't mean you don't Slow to speak doesn't mean you don't speak. speak. speak. Instead, pause before you speak. Give Instead, pause before you speak. Give Instead, pause before you speak. Give your brain and your wisdom time to catch your brain and your wisdom time to catch your brain and your wisdom time to catch up with your emotions and your impulse.

up with your emotions and your impulse. up with your emotions and your impulse. It's the difference between a reaction It's the difference between a reaction It's the difference between a reaction and a response. and a response. and a response. One is typically emotional and the other One is typically emotional and the other One is typically emotional and the other is typically thoughtful and careful. is typically thoughtful and careful. is typically thoughtful and careful. Practicing slow speaking is considering Practicing slow speaking is considering Practicing slow speaking is considering not only what you're going to say, but not only what you're going to say, but not only what you're going to say, but how you want to say it and how it might how you want to say it and how it might how you want to say it and how it might be received. be received. be received. When you slow down before speaking, When you slow down before speaking, When you slow down before speaking, three important things happen. First, three important things happen. First, three important things happen. First, you give yourself time to separate facts you give yourself time to separate facts you give yourself time to separate facts from feelings. from feelings. from feelings. In the heat of the moment, feelings are In the heat of the moment, feelings are In the heat of the moment, feelings are loud and facts are quiet. If you speak loud and facts are quiet. If you speak loud and facts are quiet. If you speak immediately, you often respond to what immediately, you often respond to what immediately, you often respond to what you feel instead of what is true. A you feel instead of what is true. A you feel instead of what is true. A short pause allows you to ask yourself, short pause allows you to ask yourself, short pause allows you to ask yourself, is this really what's happening, or is is this really what's happening, or is is this really what's happening, or is this just how it feels? this just how it feels? this just how it feels? Slowing down also helps you choose Slowing down also helps you choose Slowing down also helps you choose better words. better words. better words. You give yourself the opportunity to You give yourself the opportunity to You give yourself the opportunity to speak words that heal instead of words speak words that heal instead of words speak words that heal instead of words that wound. Words are powerful.

that wound. Words are powerful. that wound. Words are powerful. Once words leave your mouth, you can Once words leave your mouth, you can Once words leave your mouth, you can never take them back. You can apologize, never take them back. You can apologize, never take them back. You can apologize, but the words have already landed. but the words have already landed. but the words have already landed. Proverbs 12:18 says, "Reckless words Proverbs 12:18 says, "Reckless words Proverbs 12:18 says, "Reckless words pierce like a sword, pierce like a sword, pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings but the tongue of the wise brings but the tongue of the wise brings healing." Two years ago, we did a series healing." Two years ago, we did a series healing." Two years ago, we did a series about your words. And the challenge was about your words. And the challenge was about your words. And the challenge was to think t h i n k to ensure that your to think t h i n k to ensure that your to think t h i n k to ensure that your words are true. Before speaking, ask words are true. Before speaking, ask words are true. Before speaking, ask yourself, is this true? yourself, is this true? yourself, is this true? That they're helpful. Before you talk, That they're helpful. Before you talk, That they're helpful. Before you talk, ask, "Will these words promote unity and ask, "Will these words promote unity and ask, "Will these words promote unity and peace and point people to Jesus?" If peace and point people to Jesus?" If peace and point people to Jesus?" If not, you don't need to say them. not, you don't need to say them. not, you don't need to say them. Is what I'm about to say inspirational? Is what I'm about to say inspirational? Is what I'm about to say inspirational? Is it encouraging? Will it build up Is it encouraging? Will it build up Is it encouraging? Will it build up others? others? others? Is it necessary? Do I need to say this Is it necessary? Do I need to say this Is it necessary? Do I need to say this or should I just stay quiet? Who is or should I just stay quiet? Who is or should I just stay quiet? Who is going to benefit because of my words? going to benefit because of my words? going to benefit because of my words? Then finally, kind. Are these words nice Then finally, kind. Are these words nice Then finally, kind. Are these words nice and loving? Slowing down also allows you and loving? Slowing down also allows you and loving? Slowing down also allows you to consider the outcome you want.

to consider the outcome you want. to consider the outcome you want. Intense moments, people say things that Intense moments, people say things that Intense moments, people say things that feel good for 10 seconds but damage the feel good for 10 seconds but damage the feel good for 10 seconds but damage the relationship for 10 years. relationship for 10 years. relationship for 10 years. The goal of a conversation is not to The goal of a conversation is not to The goal of a conversation is not to win. The goal is to strengthen the win. The goal is to strengthen the win. The goal is to strengthen the relationship and honor God. relationship and honor God. relationship and honor God. Often conflicts escalate simply because Often conflicts escalate simply because Often conflicts escalate simply because two people are speaking too quickly. One two people are speaking too quickly. One two people are speaking too quickly. One person says something with an edge. The person says something with an edge. The person says something with an edge. The other person fires back immediately. The other person fires back immediately. The other person fires back immediately. The first person escalates again. The first person escalates again. The first person escalates again. The volumes rise. The words get harsher. And volumes rise. The words get harsher. And volumes rise. The words get harsher. And the conversation is quickly and the conversation is quickly and the conversation is quickly and completely out of control. But when you completely out of control. But when you completely out of control. But when you slow down, slow down, slow down, the entire direction of the conversation the entire direction of the conversation the entire direction of the conversation can change. A pause is powerful. can change. A pause is powerful. can change. A pause is powerful. Sometimes the most spiritual thing you Sometimes the most spiritual thing you Sometimes the most spiritual thing you can do in a tense moment is take a can do in a tense moment is take a can do in a tense moment is take a breath and wait a few seconds before breath and wait a few seconds before breath and wait a few seconds before responding or a few minutes or a few responding or a few minutes or a few responding or a few minutes or a few hours, hours, hours, maybe even a few days maybe even a few days maybe even a few days or a few months or maybe never.

or a few months or maybe never. or a few months or maybe never. This principle works for your words This principle works for your words This principle works for your words online, too. Slowing down before you online, too. Slowing down before you online, too. Slowing down before you type or before you hit post has a type or before you hit post has a type or before you hit post has a dramatic impact on what you display for dramatic impact on what you display for dramatic impact on what you display for the world to see. the world to see. the world to see. It pains me to see faithful, committed It pains me to see faithful, committed It pains me to see faithful, committed members of our church post hateful, members of our church post hateful, members of our church post hateful, angry, uninformed posts simply because angry, uninformed posts simply because angry, uninformed posts simply because they typed in a fit of rage and emotion. If you slow down, you wouldn't rush to If you slow down, you wouldn't rush to tear down the politician you disagree tear down the politician you disagree tear down the politician you disagree with or bash the local experience that with or bash the local experience that with or bash the local experience that got your the local business that got got your the local business that got got your the local business that got your order wrong or gossip about the your order wrong or gossip about the your order wrong or gossip about the president of PTA. president of PTA. president of PTA. If you're guilty of making quick, If you're guilty of making quick, If you're guilty of making quick, emotional comments and posts, it's time emotional comments and posts, it's time emotional comments and posts, it's time to clean up your Facebook. Go back and to clean up your Facebook. Go back and to clean up your Facebook. Go back and delete anything that was posted in a delete anything that was posted in a delete anything that was posted in a rush. Remove anything that goes against rush. Remove anything that goes against rush. Remove anything that goes against James words. You say, "Well, Pastor Rod, James words. You say, "Well, Pastor Rod, James words. You say, "Well, Pastor Rod, there's not anything left on my there's not anything left on my there's not anything left on my Facebook."

Facebook." Facebook." Praise the Lord. Then from now on, wait 24 hours before Then from now on, wait 24 hours before you post anything. Whether it seems you post anything. Whether it seems you post anything. Whether it seems light-hearted or not, 24 hours of light-hearted or not, 24 hours of light-hearted or not, 24 hours of waiting will give you time for common waiting will give you time for common waiting will give you time for common sense to kick in. sense to kick in. sense to kick in. Your natural tendency is to be quick to Your natural tendency is to be quick to Your natural tendency is to be quick to speak and slow to listen. When you speak and slow to listen. When you speak and slow to listen. When you reverse that, when you are quick to reverse that, when you are quick to reverse that, when you are quick to listen and slow to speak, something listen and slow to speak, something listen and slow to speak, something happens inside of you. Your emotions happens inside of you. Your emotions happens inside of you. Your emotions settle. Your thoughts become clearer. settle. Your thoughts become clearer. settle. Your thoughts become clearer. Your responses become wiser. That leads Your responses become wiser. That leads Your responses become wiser. That leads to step three. My dear brothers, take to step three. My dear brothers, take to step three. My dear brothers, take note of this. Everyone should be quick note of this. Everyone should be quick note of this. Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak. And now it to listen, slow to speak. And now it to listen, slow to speak. And now it gets difficult gets difficult gets difficult and slow to become angry. and slow to become angry. and slow to become angry. Listen. Listen. Listen. Pause before you speak and then control Pause before you speak and then control Pause before you speak and then control your emotions. your emotions. your emotions. Anger is the first emotion people Anger is the first emotion people Anger is the first emotion people experience. If you have kids, you know experience. If you have kids, you know experience. If you have kids, you know what I'm talking about.

what I'm talking about. what I'm talking about. >> The moment a baby is born, they're >> The moment a baby is born, they're >> The moment a baby is born, they're angry. angry. angry. They are mad if they don't get fed. They are mad if they don't get fed. They are mad if they don't get fed. They're ticked off if they don't get They're ticked off if they don't get They're ticked off if they don't get changed. They're mad if you don't hold changed. They're mad if you don't hold changed. They're mad if you don't hold them. They're mad if the wrong person them. They're mad if the wrong person them. They're mad if the wrong person holds them. They're mad. holds them. They're mad. holds them. They're mad. But when babies get angry, we don't hold But when babies get angry, we don't hold But when babies get angry, we don't hold it against them because they haven't yet it against them because they haven't yet it against them because they haven't yet learned to control their emotions and learned to control their emotions and learned to control their emotions and desires. After all, they're just babies. We understand babies are going to get We understand babies are going to get angry. Unfortunately, some adults don't angry. Unfortunately, some adults don't angry. Unfortunately, some adults don't handle their anger any better than handle their anger any better than handle their anger any better than babies. babies. babies. A while back, I played golf with a guy A while back, I played golf with a guy A while back, I played golf with a guy who is a pretty good player. He was who is a pretty good player. He was who is a pretty good player. He was beating me by a couple shots when we got beating me by a couple shots when we got beating me by a couple shots when we got to the 13th TE. to the 13th TE. to the 13th TE. He hooked his drive left out of bounds. He hooked his drive left out of bounds. He hooked his drive left out of bounds. So, now he had to tee up another one. So, now he had to tee up another one. So, now he had to tee up another one. Same place. He's He's hitting his third Same place. He's He's hitting his third Same place. He's He's hitting his third shot.

shot. shot. Hooked it again out of bounds. Now he's Hooked it again out of bounds. Now he's Hooked it again out of bounds. Now he's hitting his fifth shot and he's still on hitting his fifth shot and he's still on hitting his fifth shot and he's still on the T. I'm just watching. the T. I'm just watching. the T. I'm just watching. It was so predictable. He hit another It was so predictable. He hit another It was so predictable. He hit another duck hook out of bounds. duck hook out of bounds. duck hook out of bounds. He jumped up and down, started pounding He jumped up and down, started pounding He jumped up and down, started pounding his driver on the ground, and then his driver on the ground, and then his driver on the ground, and then snapped it over his knee and threw it in snapped it over his knee and threw it in snapped it over his knee and threw it in the trash. the trash. the trash. His anger solved absolutely nothing. His anger solved absolutely nothing. His anger solved absolutely nothing. Here's all it accomplished. Here's all it accomplished. Here's all it accomplished. Number one, I beat him because he made a Number one, I beat him because he made a Number one, I beat him because he made a 12 on that hole. 12 on that hole. 12 on that hole. Number two, he had to place an expensive Number two, he had to place an expensive Number two, he had to place an expensive golf club. And number three, I lost all golf club. And number three, I lost all golf club. And number three, I lost all respect for him. respect for him. respect for him. It's fascinating to me, but some It's fascinating to me, but some It's fascinating to me, but some misguided people are actually proud of misguided people are actually proud of misguided people are actually proud of their anger and their temper. their anger and their temper. their anger and their temper. They even brag about it. Well, I sure They even brag about it. Well, I sure They even brag about it. Well, I sure told him off. told him off. told him off. I blasted them. They won't cross me I blasted them. They won't cross me I blasted them. They won't cross me again. I just tell it like it is. I again. I just tell it like it is. I again. I just tell it like it is. I can't think of another sin we brag can't think of another sin we brag can't think of another sin we brag about.

about. about. You don't hear people say, "Well, I You don't hear people say, "Well, I You don't hear people say, "Well, I committed adultery today." committed adultery today." committed adultery today." Or, "Man, I sure cheated my company this Or, "Man, I sure cheated my company this Or, "Man, I sure cheated my company this week." week." week." Anger is expensive. It cost you so much. Anger is expensive. It cost you so much. Anger is expensive. It cost you so much. You can never take back the words you You can never take back the words you You can never take back the words you say in anger. You can never undo what say in anger. You can never undo what say in anger. You can never undo what you've done. Anger is like throwing you've done. Anger is like throwing you've done. Anger is like throwing gasoline on a fire and hoping it will gasoline on a fire and hoping it will gasoline on a fire and hoping it will cool things down. cool things down. cool things down. Some of you have lost jobs because of Some of you have lost jobs because of Some of you have lost jobs because of your anger. your anger. your anger. Others of you have lost relationships Others of you have lost relationships Others of you have lost relationships because of anger. Your life is riddled because of anger. Your life is riddled because of anger. Your life is riddled with broken hearts, broken hopes, and with broken hearts, broken hopes, and with broken hearts, broken hopes, and broken dreams. All because you can't broken dreams. All because you can't broken dreams. All because you can't control your temper. control your temper. control your temper. Some of you have destroyed marriages. Some of you have destroyed marriages. Some of you have destroyed marriages. Others of you have lost relationship Others of you have lost relationship Others of you have lost relationship with your children or your brothers and with your children or your brothers and with your children or your brothers and sisters. Some of you have horribly hurt sisters. Some of you have horribly hurt sisters. Some of you have horribly hurt your parents. your parents. your parents. In addition, there's a physical cost In addition, there's a physical cost In addition, there's a physical cost from your anger. Anger elevates blood from your anger. Anger elevates blood from your anger. Anger elevates blood pressure.

pressure. pressure. Anger increases threat of stroke, heart Anger increases threat of stroke, heart Anger increases threat of stroke, heart disease, and cancer. disease, and cancer. disease, and cancer. Anger incur increases occurrence of Anger incur increases occurrence of Anger incur increases occurrence of depression. depression. depression. Think about it. The last time you got Think about it. The last time you got Think about it. The last time you got really angry, you got really depressed really angry, you got really depressed really angry, you got really depressed afterwards. afterwards. afterwards. The angrier you get, the more depressed The angrier you get, the more depressed The angrier you get, the more depressed you get. you get. you get. Negativity affects the immune system. Negativity affects the immune system. Negativity affects the immune system. Angry people have lots of little aches Angry people have lots of little aches Angry people have lots of little aches and pains or get lots of colds and bouts and pains or get lots of colds and bouts and pains or get lots of colds and bouts of flu or headaches or upset stomachs. of flu or headaches or upset stomachs. of flu or headaches or upset stomachs. Angry people tend to seek relief from Angry people tend to seek relief from Angry people tend to seek relief from the moods caused by anger through other the moods caused by anger through other the moods caused by anger through other health damaging habits such as vaping, health damaging habits such as vaping, health damaging habits such as vaping, drinking, or through compulsive behavior drinking, or through compulsive behavior drinking, or through compulsive behavior like workcoholism and perfectionism. like workcoholism and perfectionism. like workcoholism and perfectionism. I say all that and you just say, "Well, I say all that and you just say, "Well, I say all that and you just say, "Well, I just have a temper. I don't get mad. I I just have a temper. I don't get mad. I I just have a temper. I don't get mad. I get even." Wow. How's that working out for you? Is Wow. How's that working out for you? Is it worth it?

it worth it? it worth it? Anger is so expensive. Proverbs 14:17 Anger is so expensive. Proverbs 14:17 Anger is so expensive. Proverbs 14:17 says, "A quicktee man does foolish says, "A quicktee man does foolish says, "A quicktee man does foolish things." things." things." Proverbs 29:11, "A fool gives vent to Proverbs 29:11, "A fool gives vent to Proverbs 29:11, "A fool gives vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself his anger, but a wise man keeps himself his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control." I've got good news for under control." I've got good news for under control." I've got good news for you. Anger doesn't have to dominate your you. Anger doesn't have to dominate your you. Anger doesn't have to dominate your life and relationships. life and relationships. life and relationships. If you are quick to listen and slow to If you are quick to listen and slow to If you are quick to listen and slow to speak, it's almost automatic that you'll speak, it's almost automatic that you'll speak, it's almost automatic that you'll be slow to become angry. At the very be slow to become angry. At the very be slow to become angry. At the very least, your chances dramatically least, your chances dramatically least, your chances dramatically improve. improve. improve. My brothers, take note of this. My brothers, take note of this. My brothers, take note of this. Everyone, Everyone, Everyone, that's all of us should be quick to that's all of us should be quick to that's all of us should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to listen, slow to speak, and slow to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry. And now, now we get down become angry. And now, now we get down become angry. And now, now we get down to it right here. Why? to it right here. Why? to it right here. Why? Not because just because you're making a Not because just because you're making a Not because just because you're making a fool of yourself. fool of yourself. fool of yourself. Not just because you're damaging Not just because you're damaging Not just because you're damaging relationships. relationships. relationships. Not because you're losing your Not because you're losing your Not because you're losing your influence. Here's why. For man's anger influence. Here's why. For man's anger influence. Here's why. For man's anger does not bring about the righteous life does not bring about the righteous life does not bring about the righteous life God desires.

The King J. James says it this way. The The King J. James says it this way. The wrath of man workketh not the wrath of man workketh not the wrath of man workketh not the righteousness of God. righteousness of God. righteousness of God. Anger's not the answer. Anger's not the answer. Anger's not the answer. Anger can stand in the way of the Anger can stand in the way of the Anger can stand in the way of the righteous life God desires for you. He righteous life God desires for you. He righteous life God desires for you. He wants you to be pure, kind, loving. He wants you to be pure, kind, loving. He wants you to be pure, kind, loving. He wants you to live like Jesus. Anger wants you to live like Jesus. Anger wants you to live like Jesus. Anger removes you from righteousness and removes you from righteousness and removes you from righteousness and impacts your eternity. Sadly, it can impacts your eternity. Sadly, it can impacts your eternity. Sadly, it can also affect the eternity of others. also affect the eternity of others. also affect the eternity of others. I have never met someone who said, "I I have never met someone who said, "I I have never met someone who said, "I decided to follow Jesus." When I met an decided to follow Jesus." When I met an decided to follow Jesus." When I met an angry Christian angry Christian angry Christian or when I saw that angry, mean Facebook or when I saw that angry, mean Facebook or when I saw that angry, mean Facebook post, I just knew it was time to give my post, I just knew it was time to give my post, I just knew it was time to give my heart to Jesus. heart to Jesus. heart to Jesus. You won't reach your friends with anger. You won't reach your friends with anger. You won't reach your friends with anger. We won't win the world with anger. I've We won't win the world with anger. I've We won't win the world with anger. I've never met someone who has shouted or never met someone who has shouted or never met someone who has shouted or argued to Jesus. We won't turn back the argued to Jesus. We won't turn back the argued to Jesus. We won't turn back the tide of evil by getting mad. tide of evil by getting mad. tide of evil by getting mad. It just doesn't work. The wrath of man It just doesn't work. The wrath of man It just doesn't work. The wrath of man workketh not the righteousness of God.

workketh not the righteousness of God. workketh not the righteousness of God. In his book, Unoffendable, Bryant Hansen In his book, Unoffendable, Bryant Hansen In his book, Unoffendable, Bryant Hansen wrote, "Anger doesn't change anything. wrote, "Anger doesn't change anything. wrote, "Anger doesn't change anything. Action changes things." Action changes things." Action changes things." Do not confuse the two, as many often Do not confuse the two, as many often Do not confuse the two, as many often do. In my view, it's amazing how little do. In my view, it's amazing how little do. In my view, it's amazing how little all the righteously angry people all the righteously angry people all the righteously angry people actually do. They get worked up, maybe actually do. They get worked up, maybe actually do. They get worked up, maybe fire off some social media posts, and fire off some social media posts, and fire off some social media posts, and pat themselves on the back for being so pat themselves on the back for being so pat themselves on the back for being so righteous in their anger. In fact, righteous in their anger. In fact, righteous in their anger. In fact, they'll get mad if you're not mad enough they'll get mad if you're not mad enough they'll get mad if you're not mad enough about the things they're mad about. about the things they're mad about. about the things they're mad about. Happens to me all the time. People leave Happens to me all the time. People leave Happens to me all the time. People leave the church because I won't be angry at the church because I won't be angry at the church because I won't be angry at the things they're angry about. the things they're angry about. the things they're angry about. So, since I know what you're going to So, since I know what you're going to So, since I know what you're going to email this week, I want to save you the email this week, I want to save you the email this week, I want to save you the time and go ahead and give you my answer time and go ahead and give you my answer time and go ahead and give you my answer now. So, listen to this. You're going to now. So, listen to this. You're going to now. So, listen to this. You're going to say, "Pastor Rod, the Bible tells us to say, "Pastor Rod, the Bible tells us to say, "Pastor Rod, the Bible tells us to be angry." be angry." be angry." Let's let's look at that verse in Let's let's look at that verse in Let's let's look at that verse in context, beginning with Ephesians 4 context, beginning with Ephesians 4 context, beginning with Ephesians 4 verse 22.

verse 22. verse 22. You were taught with regard to your You were taught with regard to your You were taught with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old former way of life, to put off your old former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its self, which is being corrupted by its self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires, to be made new in the deceitful desires, to be made new in the deceitful desires, to be made new in the attitude of your minds, and to put on attitude of your minds, and to put on attitude of your minds, and to put on the new self, created to be like God in the new self, created to be like God in the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness. true righteousness and holiness. true righteousness and holiness. Therefore, each of you must put off Therefore, each of you must put off Therefore, each of you must put off falsehood, speak truthfully to his falsehood, speak truthfully to his falsehood, speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one neighbor, for we are all members of one neighbor, for we are all members of one body. In your anger, do not sin. body. In your anger, do not sin. body. In your anger, do not sin. Do not let the sun go down while you're Do not let the sun go down while you're Do not let the sun go down while you're still angry. And do not give the devil a still angry. And do not give the devil a still angry. And do not give the devil a foothold. Paul was saying anger was your foothold. Paul was saying anger was your foothold. Paul was saying anger was your old way of life. And now you have new old way of life. And now you have new old way of life. And now you have new life in Jesus. So don't let that anger life in Jesus. So don't let that anger life in Jesus. So don't let that anger dominate and control you anymore. Don't dominate and control you anymore. Don't dominate and control you anymore. Don't sin when you're anger angry. And don't sin when you're anger angry. And don't sin when you're anger angry. And don't even let the sun go down while you're so even let the sun go down while you're so even let the sun go down while you're so angry. Which means angry. Which means angry. Which means you can't be angry for very long. Anger is an emotion like every other Anger is an emotion like every other emotion. It's not bad to feel angry emotion. It's not bad to feel angry emotion. It's not bad to feel angry so long as it doesn't last enough to so long as it doesn't last enough to so long as it doesn't last enough to control you.

control you. control you. Anger may visit you, but it should never Anger may visit you, but it should never Anger may visit you, but it should never move in. move in. move in. It should never become the atmosphere of It should never become the atmosphere of It should never become the atmosphere of your home or your life. Faith that your home or your life. Faith that your home or your life. Faith that works, listens first, speaks carefully, works, listens first, speaks carefully, works, listens first, speaks carefully, and refuses to let anger win. and refuses to let anger win. and refuses to let anger win. So make this your goal. So make this your goal. So make this your goal. Quick to listen, Quick to listen, Quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to speak, slow to speak, slow to become angry. slow to become angry. slow to become angry. Would you bow your heads with me? This one's going to be a little This one's going to be a little challenging. cuz I want to pray for you. cuz I want to pray for you. If you say, "Pastor Rod, this one just If you say, "Pastor Rod, this one just If you say, "Pastor Rod, this one just hit me hard hit me hard hit me hard because I've been struggling with anger.

because I've been struggling with anger. because I've been struggling with anger. and I've let it get the best of me. and I've let it get the best of me. and I've let it get the best of me. I I'm I am done with my anger costing I I'm I am done with my anger costing I I'm I am done with my anger costing me. You might be angry in general, might be You might be angry in general, might be angry towards one specific individual. angry towards one specific individual. angry towards one specific individual. [music] [music] [music] Your social media might be filled with Your social media might be filled with Your social media might be filled with angry rants which change absolutely angry rants which change absolutely angry rants which change absolutely nothing. nothing. nothing. But you say, "Pastor Rod, I got to get But you say, "Pastor Rod, I got to get But you say, "Pastor Rod, I got to get past this past this past this and I I need God's help." and I I need God's help." and I I need God's help." It's obvious the Lord knew it would be a It's obvious the Lord knew it would be a It's obvious the Lord knew it would be a struggle. That's why [music] this made struggle. That's why [music] this made struggle. That's why [music] this made the Bible. So, it's time. So, it's time. I want you to be bold. You say, "I I've I want you to be bold. You say, "I I've I want you to be bold. You say, "I I've got to get past this. I want you to got to get past this. I want you to got to get past this. I want you to stand and I'm going to pray for you." stand and I'm going to pray for you." stand and I'm going to pray for you." You say, "Well, what are people going to You say, "Well, what are people going to You say, "Well, what are people going to think?" People already know, think?" People already know, think?" People already know, okay? It's not like you're gonna okay? It's not like you're gonna okay? It's not like you're gonna surprise people. You stand up and surprise people. You stand up and surprise people. You stand up and they're like, "I never knew you got they're like, "I never knew you got they're like, "I never knew you got mad."

They're going to celebrate with you. And They're going to celebrate with you. And it's time. Listen to me. It's time. it's time. Listen to me. It's time. it's time. Listen to me. It's time. Don't let anger win anymore. Don't let anger win anymore. Don't let anger win anymore. It's time. Somebody standing near you, stand with Somebody standing near you, stand with them. Put your hand on their shoulder. them. Put your hand on their shoulder. them. Put your hand on their shoulder. We're going to pray together. We're going to pray together. We're going to pray together. The people standing with you are going The people standing with you are going The people standing with you are going to pray for you. I'm going to pray for to pray for you. I'm going to pray for to pray for you. I'm going to pray for you. you. you. We're going to start with repentance. We're going to start with repentance. We're going to start with repentance. Lord, we ask for your forgiveness. Lord, we ask for your forgiveness. Lord, we ask for your forgiveness. Forgive us for allowing uncontrolled Forgive us for allowing uncontrolled Forgive us for allowing uncontrolled emotion emotion emotion to bring harm to ourselves, to others, to bring harm to ourselves, to others, to bring harm to ourselves, to others, to our witness and our testimony. to our witness and our testimony. to our witness and our testimony. Lord, we ask your forgiveness. [music] Lord, we ask your forgiveness. [music] Lord, we ask your forgiveness. [music] We ask your forgiveness for this part of We ask your forgiveness for this part of We ask your forgiveness for this part of our life that's not under the spirit's our life that's not under the spirit's our life that's not under the spirit's control. And we know that anything not control. And we know that anything not control. And we know that anything not under your control is wrong. So we ask under your control is wrong. So we ask under your control is wrong. So we ask for your forgiveness in Jesus name.

for your forgiveness in Jesus name. for your forgiveness in Jesus name. Lord, then I pray Lord, then I pray Lord, then I pray for each pe [music] person standing, for for each pe [music] person standing, for for each pe [music] person standing, for people watching at home, I pray Lord, people watching at home, I pray Lord, people watching at home, I pray Lord, they would put these three steps into they would put these three steps into they would put these three steps into action. They'd be quick to listen. action. They'd be quick to listen. action. They'd be quick to listen. They would actually listen to what the They would actually listen to what the They would actually listen to what the other person is saying, and they would other person is saying, and they would other person is saying, and they would listen for the need behind it. They listen for the need behind it. They listen for the need behind it. They would listen for the purpose for the would listen for the purpose for the would listen for the purpose for the conversation. They would listen to conversation. They would listen to conversation. They would listen to understand instead of listening to form understand instead of listening to form understand instead of listening to form their argument next. I pray that they their argument next. I pray that they their argument next. I pray that they would be quick to listen. And Lord, would be quick to listen. And Lord, would be quick to listen. And Lord, would you help us be slow to speak? would you help us be slow to speak? would you help us be slow to speak? Let our words be measured and pleasing Let our words be measured and pleasing Let our words be measured and pleasing to you. Let what we say and what we post to you. Let what we say and what we post to you. Let what we say and what we post bring glory to your name. bring glory to your name. bring glory to your name. And then God, I pray that they would And then God, I pray that they would And then God, I pray that they would [music] be slow to become angry. Lord, [music] be slow to become angry. Lord, [music] be slow to become angry. Lord, we confess this has really been a we confess this has really been a we confess this has really been a struggle. And this is a struggle that struggle. And this is a struggle that struggle. And this is a struggle that we're ready to win the battle over we're ready to win the battle over we're ready to win the battle over anger. Thank you that the fruit of the anger. Thank you that the fruit of the anger. Thank you that the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, goodness, [music] goodness, [music] goodness, [music] kindness, gentleness, and self-control.

kindness, gentleness, and self-control. kindness, gentleness, and self-control. And so we pray that the fruit of the And so we pray that the fruit of the And so we pray that the fruit of the Holy Spirit would be present in our Holy Spirit would be present in our Holy Spirit would be present in our lives lives lives and anger would not dominate or control and anger would not dominate or control and anger would not dominate or control us anymore. Lord, we give that up to you us anymore. Lord, we give that up to you us anymore. Lord, we give that up to you right now. right now. right now. We pray for the person we're angry with. We forgive them the way you forgave us. We forgive them the way you forgave us. And we set aside the anger. Lord, we And we set aside the anger. Lord, we And we set aside the anger. Lord, we leave them in your hands, not our hands. leave them in your hands, not our hands. leave them in your hands, not our hands. We set aside the anger. I pray, Lord, We set aside the anger. I pray, Lord, We set aside the anger. I pray, Lord, that blood pressure would improve. I that blood pressure would improve. I that blood pressure would improve. I pray that health would improve and that pray that health would improve and that pray that health would improve and that sleep would come. Lord, we want every sleep would come. Lord, we want every sleep would come. Lord, we want every part of our lives to be submitted to part of our lives to be submitted to part of our lives to be submitted to your will and to your plan, including your will and to your plan, including your will and to your plan, including our emotions. our emotions. our emotions. And so we commit [music] this to you. We And so we commit [music] this to you. We And so we commit [music] this to you. We ask for your help. Help us, Lord. Help ask for your help. Help us, Lord. Help ask for your help. Help us, Lord. Help us to control this us to control this us to control this in Jesus name.

in Jesus name. in Jesus name. Amen.