Beneath The Surface: Finding Strength Through Breast Cancer

so in April of so in April of 2022 uh a lump appeared above my breast 2022 uh a lump appeared above my breast 2022 uh a lump appeared above my breast on my sternum area and I felt it and I'm on my sternum area and I felt it and I'm on my sternum area and I felt it and I'm like what is this a week later I was like what is this a week later I was like what is this a week later I was having a biopsy and the diagnosis came having a biopsy and the diagnosis came having a biopsy and the diagnosis came back that it was back that it was back that it was malignant I couldn't believe it I was malignant I couldn't believe it I was malignant I couldn't believe it I was like are you sure you want to run that like are you sure you want to run that like are you sure you want to run that again can you maybe take another piece again can you maybe take another piece again can you maybe take another piece of tissue out to double check because of tissue out to double check because of tissue out to double check because surely that can't be true true so actually going back to about 2016 my so actually going back to about 2016 my so actually going back to about 2016 my husband and I you know we had started husband and I you know we had started husband and I you know we had started trying to have a baby we started trying to have a baby we started trying to have a baby we started embarking on the process of you know embarking on the process of you know embarking on the process of you know looking at what our options were because looking at what our options were because looking at what our options were because we've been trying for well over a year we've been trying for well over a year we've been trying for well over a year and nothing happened and so um I was and nothing happened and so um I was and nothing happened and so um I was entered into donor program and you know entered into donor program and you know entered into donor program and you know had to be weight listed there was one had to be weight listed there was one had to be weight listed there was one list in particular where I was within list in particular where I was within list in particular where I was within the top five so I was getting so excited the top five so I was getting so excited the top five so I was getting so excited and um I was moving up on the list and and um I was moving up on the list and and um I was moving up on the list and at that point point it was about March at that point point it was about March at that point point it was about March of 2023 was when I went for my routine of 2023 was when I went for my routine of 2023 was when I went for my routine mamogram and breast mamogram and breast mamogram and breast ultrasound and 2 weeks later they called ultrasound and 2 weeks later they called ultrasound and 2 weeks later they called me saying they're you know they me saying they're you know they me saying they're you know they recommend that I do a biopsy and I said recommend that I do a biopsy and I said recommend that I do a biopsy and I said okay I'll go in for it I was a little okay I'll go in for it I was a little okay I'll go in for it I was a little hesitant but something said we should go hesitant but something said we should go hesitant but something said we should go went in and um they said don't worry 80% went in and um they said don't worry 80% went in and um they said don't worry 80% of them come back negative so I just of them come back negative so I just of them come back negative so I just figured this going to be like everybody figured this going to be like everybody figured this going to be like everybody else's it's going to come back negative else's it's going to come back negative else's it's going to come back negative and I could stay on the track that I'm and I could stay on the track that I'm and I could stay on the track that I'm on of having this baby and so um a week

on of having this baby and so um a week on of having this baby and so um a week later I got the call and um I was later I got the call and um I was later I got the call and um I was wondering why are they calling me why wondering why are they calling me why wondering why are they calling me why are you not just sending me my letter in are you not just sending me my letter in are you not just sending me my letter in the mail and that's when the doctor told the mail and that's when the doctor told the mail and that's when the doctor told me that I had breast cancer and um she me that I had breast cancer and um she me that I had breast cancer and um she said that the good thing was that they said that the good thing was that they said that the good thing was that they caught it early so I really believe that caught it early so I really believe that caught it early so I really believe that early detection did save my life and um early detection did save my life and um early detection did save my life and um you know I acted quickly whatever they you know I acted quickly whatever they you know I acted quickly whatever they told me to do I did I didn't want to told me to do I did I didn't want to told me to do I did I didn't want to wait it was in wait it was in wait it was in 2014 when I was diagnosed but there were 2014 when I was diagnosed but there were 2014 when I was diagnosed but there were no lumps no signs I had no symptoms no lumps no signs I had no symptoms no lumps no signs I had no symptoms nothing just the regular mamogram where nothing just the regular mamogram where nothing just the regular mamogram where they saw that the cells were a little they saw that the cells were a little they saw that the cells were a little bit different this time I go in and I do bit different this time I go in and I do bit different this time I go in and I do the the the biopsy and then at that time it was my biopsy and then at that time it was my biopsy and then at that time it was my primary care doctor um wanted me to come primary care doctor um wanted me to come primary care doctor um wanted me to come back with my husband and we went in and back with my husband and we went in and back with my husband and we went in and she said it's breast cancer and so we she said it's breast cancer and so we she said it's breast cancer and so we decided we would do the lumpectomy and decided we would do the lumpectomy and decided we would do the lumpectomy and then the followup would be radiation um then the followup would be radiation um then the followup would be radiation um so the lumpectomy was so the lumpectomy was so the lumpectomy was um the radiation was a challenge because um the radiation was a challenge because um the radiation was a challenge because maybe the middle of the process my skin maybe the middle of the process my skin maybe the middle of the process my skin started to break apart so then you see started to break apart so then you see started to break apart so then you see your flesh and you still had to go in your flesh and you still had to go in your flesh and you still had to go in for more you know radiation and so for more you know radiation and so for more you know radiation and so you're just burn you're literally you're just burn you're literally you're just burn you're literally burning yourself like every day and burning yourself like every day and burning yourself like every day and mentally that that starts to you know to mentally that that starts to you know to mentally that that starts to you know to have an effect on you and then we had have an effect on you and then we had have an effect on you and then we had two kids watching Mom go through this two kids watching Mom go through this two kids watching Mom go through this all the my children knew was cancer all the my children knew was cancer all the my children knew was cancer equal death of loved ones so it was an

equal death of loved ones so it was an equal death of loved ones so it was an added um assignment for me to show them added um assignment for me to show them added um assignment for me to show them that mom was going to be okay that I was that mom was going to be okay that I was that mom was going to be okay that I was going to do everything that I was going to do everything that I was going to do everything that I was supposed to do but God was going to heal supposed to do but God was going to heal supposed to do but God was going to heal me so finding the oncologist My Obgyn me so finding the oncologist My Obgyn me so finding the oncologist My Obgyn send said she was going to send me to send said she was going to send me to send said she was going to send me to the best the top of the line the first the best the top of the line the first the best the top of the line the first appointment he came into the office he appointment he came into the office he appointment he came into the office he didn't have my chart the first thing out didn't have my chart the first thing out didn't have my chart the first thing out of his mouth was well we can have a lump of his mouth was well we can have a lump of his mouth was well we can have a lump to me and we can have them except to me to me and we can have them except to me to me and we can have them except to me and I was like wait a minute where's my and I was like wait a minute where's my and I was like wait a minute where's my chart you haven't even examined me so I chart you haven't even examined me so I chart you haven't even examined me so I was out of there before you can blink an was out of there before you can blink an was out of there before you can blink an eye so when I told my family that my eye so when I told my family that my eye so when I told my family that my niece Tracy says maybe you need to find niece Tracy says maybe you need to find niece Tracy says maybe you need to find a black a black a black oncologist and I'm like okay yeah I do oncologist and I'm like okay yeah I do oncologist and I'm like okay yeah I do literally a week from that conversation literally a week from that conversation literally a week from that conversation and one of my prayer Partners Angela and one of my prayer Partners Angela and one of my prayer Partners Angela calls me up and she says Daryl you know calls me up and she says Daryl you know calls me up and she says Daryl you know being that you're going through this I being that you're going through this I being that you're going through this I have a friend who is going through have a friend who is going through have a friend who is going through cancer as well and I would love for you cancer as well and I would love for you cancer as well and I would love for you guys to meet and talk cuz maybe she can guys to meet and talk cuz maybe she can guys to meet and talk cuz maybe she can encourage you she calls me up and she encourage you she calls me up and she encourage you she calls me up and she tells me oh yes um I'm going to have tells me oh yes um I'm going to have tells me oh yes um I'm going to have surgery on Thursday and my neighbor is surgery on Thursday and my neighbor is surgery on Thursday and my neighbor is performing the surgery he's a black performing the surgery he's a black performing the surgery he's a black oncologist so that was a set up by God oncologist so that was a set up by God oncologist so that was a set up by God and immediately I said please send me and immediately I said please send me and immediately I said please send me his information I called set up an his information I called set up an his information I called set up an appointment and I was able to go and see appointment and I was able to go and see appointment and I was able to go and see him in the next week and um when I went him in the next week and um when I went him in the next week and um when I went in to see him the first thing he says to in to see him the first thing he says to in to see him the first thing he says to me is what can I do for you how can I me is what can I do for you how can I me is what can I do for you how can I help you you and he had my chart in his help you you and he had my chart in his help you you and he had my chart in his hand he was looking at the chart and he hand he was looking at the chart and he hand he was looking at the chart and he said well did they do an MRI I was like

said well did they do an MRI I was like said well did they do an MRI I was like no did they do a pet scan no did they do no did they do a pet scan no did they do no did they do a pet scan no did they do a CAT scan no he was like you know what a CAT scan no he was like you know what a CAT scan no he was like you know what this is not surprising because of the this is not surprising because of the this is not surprising because of the disparities amongst black and brown he disparities amongst black and brown he disparities amongst black and brown he even said it he said well whether you even said it he said well whether you even said it he said well whether you use me or not I'm going to order these use me or not I'm going to order these use me or not I'm going to order these tests for you they disallowed me from tests for you they disallowed me from tests for you they disallowed me from continuing the IVF at this point which continuing the IVF at this point which continuing the IVF at this point which was very devastating to me I've waited was very devastating to me I've waited was very devastating to me I've waited all this time but I now had to wait all this time but I now had to wait all this time but I now had to wait because at this point for me to progress because at this point for me to progress because at this point for me to progress with IVF could be harmful to myself and with IVF could be harmful to myself and with IVF could be harmful to myself and a baby because now estrogen and a baby because now estrogen and a baby because now estrogen and progesterone levels are high the cancer progesterone levels are high the cancer progesterone levels are high the cancer is fed it comes back even more is fed it comes back even more is fed it comes back even more aggressively and spreads more aggressively and spreads more aggressively and spreads more aggressively with that they said okay aggressively with that they said okay aggressively with that they said okay we're definitely going to treat it with we're definitely going to treat it with we're definitely going to treat it with radiation probably give it you know a radiation probably give it you know a radiation probably give it you know a few more extra sessions which they did few more extra sessions which they did few more extra sessions which they did but it's so funny that my margins they but it's so funny that my margins they but it's so funny that my margins they call these things margins that they were call these things margins that they were call these things margins that they were so narrow because it was caught so early so narrow because it was caught so early so narrow because it was caught so early you know so I would encourage women you know so I would encourage women you know so I would encourage women definitely go for your breast exams definitely go for your breast exams definitely go for your breast exams because early detection is key um I had because early detection is key um I had because early detection is key um I had no no no symptoms I felt nothing I was walking symptoms I felt nothing I was walking symptoms I felt nothing I was walking around fine and had I not gone for my around fine and had I not gone for my around fine and had I not gone for my breast exam that breast exam that breast exam that March I could have gone into an IVF March I could have gone into an IVF March I could have gone into an IVF process and this thing flare up process and this thing flare up process and this thing flare up and it' be a very different situation and it' be a very different situation and it' be a very different situation December 22nd I had appointment an December 22nd I had appointment an December 22nd I had appointment an appointment with him and he said my appointment with him and he said my appointment with him and he said my margins were clear after that second

margins were clear after that second margins were clear after that second surgery so that was a relief and then surgery so that was a relief and then surgery so that was a relief and then for precautionary measures my doctor did for precautionary measures my doctor did for precautionary measures my doctor did say that he wanted me to have chemo I say that he wanted me to have chemo I say that he wanted me to have chemo I started Googling on my phone I see coal started Googling on my phone I see coal started Googling on my phone I see coal caps I'm like what's that I've never caps I'm like what's that I've never caps I'm like what's that I've never even heard of that Co caps go online even heard of that Co caps go online even heard of that Co caps go online again the hospital that comes up I call again the hospital that comes up I call again the hospital that comes up I call them you guys have Co caps yes we do is them you guys have Co caps yes we do is them you guys have Co caps yes we do is it possible for me to come and get my it possible for me to come and get my it possible for me to come and get my chemo treatment there because I would chemo treatment there because I would chemo treatment there because I would like to use a CO cap cuz I don't want to like to use a CO cap cuz I don't want to like to use a CO cap cuz I don't want to lose my hair of course records transfer lose my hair of course records transfer lose my hair of course records transfer this all happened very quickly too was this all happened very quickly too was this all happened very quickly too was amazing so we go through this process amazing so we go through this process amazing so we go through this process I'm not feeling what I'm should be I'm not feeling what I'm should be I'm not feeling what I'm should be feeling right by the fourth treatment feeling right by the fourth treatment feeling right by the fourth treatment I'm brushing my hair and at home putting I'm brushing my hair and at home putting I'm brushing my hair and at home putting my hair in a ponytail it starts coming my hair in a ponytail it starts coming my hair in a ponytail it starts coming out I'm like oh my God and I'm literally out I'm like oh my God and I'm literally out I'm like oh my God and I'm literally like just pulling on it and it is coming like just pulling on it and it is coming like just pulling on it and it is coming out in my hand there were a few strands out in my hand there were a few strands out in my hand there were a few strands that I was trying to save and a dear that I was trying to save and a dear that I was trying to save and a dear friend of mine said you need to shave friend of mine said you need to shave friend of mine said you need to shave your hair so that when it does grow back your hair so that when it does grow back your hair so that when it does grow back it can start from scratch and so he it can start from scratch and so he it can start from scratch and so he shaved it and I was bald I still don't shaved it and I was bald I still don't shaved it and I was bald I still don't have the courage to go out with what my have the courage to go out with what my have the courage to go out with what my hair looks like right now and I used to hair looks like right now and I used to hair looks like right now and I used to wear my hair short back in the day all wear my hair short back in the day all wear my hair short back in the day all the time but cutting your hair and the time but cutting your hair and the time but cutting your hair and losing your hair two different things losing your hair two different things losing your hair two different things two different Dynamics for me for the two different Dynamics for me for the two different Dynamics for me for the fifth anniversary of being cancer free I fifth anniversary of being cancer free I fifth anniversary of being cancer free I had 10 friends and we celebrated we wore had 10 friends and we celebrated we wore had 10 friends and we celebrated we wore pink you know they gave me a shout out pink you know they gave me a shout out pink you know they gave me a shout out and we're going crazy and then I went and we're going crazy and then I went and we're going crazy and then I went for my mamogram and they said we see

for my mamogram and they said we see for my mamogram and they said we see something and I was like oh no the something and I was like oh no the something and I was like oh no the machine must be broke they were like machine must be broke they were like machine must be broke they were like let's just go let's do the biopsy again let's just go let's do the biopsy again let's just go let's do the biopsy again so my phone rings and I pick it up and so my phone rings and I pick it up and so my phone rings and I pick it up and it's the doctor and she's like okay it's it's the doctor and she's like okay it's it's the doctor and she's like okay it's it's back so December 11th of it's back so December 11th of it's back so December 11th of 2019 I had um my breast removed and the 2019 I had um my breast removed and the 2019 I had um my breast removed and the day that I started my first chemotherapy day that I started my first chemotherapy day that I started my first chemotherapy treatment my Village my My Tribe they treatment my Village my My Tribe they treatment my Village my My Tribe they all came with me I got to my second all came with me I got to my second all came with me I got to my second treatment and Co happened everything was treatment and Co happened everything was treatment and Co happened everything was shut down and they weren't allowing shut down and they weren't allowing shut down and they weren't allowing people um to come in so here I'm by people um to come in so here I'm by people um to come in so here I'm by myself in the hospital and one of my myself in the hospital and one of my myself in the hospital and one of my good friends I don't know how she did it good friends I don't know how she did it good friends I don't know how she did it I fell asleep I woke up and I saw her I fell asleep I woke up and I saw her I fell asleep I woke up and I saw her there she's there with her mask on and there she's there with her mask on and there she's there with her mask on and she's like I I knew you were here I just she's like I I knew you were here I just she's like I I knew you were here I just wanted you to know like we're around wanted you to know like we're around wanted you to know like we're around we're thinking about you we're praying we're thinking about you we're praying we're thinking about you we're praying for you like those are those moments you for you like those are those moments you for you like those are those moments you know God will just keep on blessing you know God will just keep on blessing you know God will just keep on blessing you so you can keep on you know going this so you can keep on you know going this so you can keep on you know going this is why we got to have Community A is why we got to have Community A is why we got to have Community A girlfriend of mine called me up and said girlfriend of mine called me up and said girlfriend of mine called me up and said Daryl did you have an advocate or a Daryl did you have an advocate or a Daryl did you have an advocate or a social worker speak with you while you social worker speak with you while you social worker speak with you while you were going through your treatments I'm were going through your treatments I'm were going through your treatments I'm like I don't have an advocate or a like I don't have an advocate or a like I don't have an advocate or a social worker she said oh you do the social worker she said oh you do the social worker she said oh you do the social worker and The Advocate that I social worker and The Advocate that I social worker and The Advocate that I eventually found out that I had she sent eventually found out that I had she sent eventually found out that I had she sent me a list of resources and I began to go me a list of resources and I began to go me a list of resources and I began to go down the list and start sending emails down the list and start sending emails down the list and start sending emails to these resources or there was to these resources or there was to these resources or there was applications for financial support for

applications for financial support for applications for financial support for wigs for eyelashes for tattoos I mean it wigs for eyelashes for tattoos I mean it wigs for eyelashes for tattoos I mean it was endless to what they were offering was endless to what they were offering was endless to what they were offering and I'm wondering how many other people and I'm wondering how many other people and I'm wondering how many other people out there that have been dealing with out there that have been dealing with out there that have been dealing with breast cancer or cancer of any sort have breast cancer or cancer of any sort have breast cancer or cancer of any sort have a clue about them and that was one of a clue about them and that was one of a clue about them and that was one of the things I started telling people did the things I started telling people did the things I started telling people did you know about Cancer Care did you know you know about Cancer Care did you know you know about Cancer Care did you know about sharette did you know about about sharette did you know about about sharette did you know about rocking a road for a cure and there's rocking a road for a cure and there's rocking a road for a cure and there's more that those are just the ones that more that those are just the ones that more that those are just the ones that I've engaged recently I needed my I've engaged recently I needed my I've engaged recently I needed my mortgage paid that month did they not mortgage paid that month did they not mortgage paid that month did they not pay my mortgage I'm I can't even tell pay my mortgage I'm I can't even tell pay my mortgage I'm I can't even tell you this was God moving through people you this was God moving through people you this was God moving through people so um the plan is to have 5 years of so um the plan is to have 5 years of so um the plan is to have 5 years of hormone therapy because of my unique hormone therapy because of my unique hormone therapy because of my unique case they're going to pause me after 2 case they're going to pause me after 2 case they're going to pause me after 2 and then I'll take a break off the and then I'll take a break off the and then I'll take a break off the medication for about 2 months and and medication for about 2 months and and medication for about 2 months and and then I'll be able to move forward with then I'll be able to move forward with then I'll be able to move forward with um my IVF process but in the um my IVF process but in the um my IVF process but in the meantime um we had a great meantime um we had a great meantime um we had a great surprise um so our donor I was on this surprise um so our donor I was on this surprise um so our donor I was on this list and um I it was amazing how quickly list and um I it was amazing how quickly list and um I it was amazing how quickly we moved up the list and so they called we moved up the list and so they called we moved up the list and so they called us and said she's available um she's us and said she's available um she's us and said she's available um she's going for retrieval on September 13th going for retrieval on September 13th going for retrieval on September 13th and I was like wow um okay and I and I was like wow um okay and I and I was like wow um okay and I remember I prayed I had six eggs in my remember I prayed I had six eggs in my remember I prayed I had six eggs in my donor package so they give you packages donor package so they give you packages donor package so they give you packages that can pick from and I picked the that can pick from and I picked the that can pick from and I picked the standard one and they ask you do you standard one and they ask you do you standard one and they ask you do you want to get extra because you lose half want to get extra because you lose half want to get extra because you lose half in the process of fertilization I said in the process of fertilization I said in the process of fertilization I said well it's costly I said I'm just going well it's costly I said I'm just going well it's costly I said I'm just going to take the six and I'm going to trust to take the six and I'm going to trust to take the six and I'm going to trust that God is going to give us the maximum

that God is going to give us the maximum that God is going to give us the maximum number of eggs and I prayed and I said number of eggs and I prayed and I said number of eggs and I prayed and I said God you know the process you know our God you know the process you know our God you know the process you know our goal give us the maximum number if not goal give us the maximum number if not goal give us the maximum number if not six give us a minimum of five and so we six give us a minimum of five and so we six give us a minimum of five and so we knew that wasn't the norm but we know knew that wasn't the norm but we know knew that wasn't the norm but we know that we're children of God so the next that we're children of God so the next that we're children of God so the next next day they call us and um they told next day they call us and um they told next day they call us and um they told us that we have five us that we have five us that we have five embryos so they'll be there and waiting embryos so they'll be there and waiting embryos so they'll be there and waiting for us in 2 years when we're ready to go for us in 2 years when we're ready to go for us in 2 years when we're ready to go have our rainbow baby my encouragement have our rainbow baby my encouragement have our rainbow baby my encouragement to anyone and I I'm this was me doing it to anyone and I I'm this was me doing it to anyone and I I'm this was me doing it as well doing my own research asking a as well doing my own research asking a as well doing my own research asking a multiplicity of questions if they're multiplicity of questions if they're multiplicity of questions if they're diagnosing you with something and giving diagnosing you with something and giving diagnosing you with something and giving you a prescription to go fill look up you a prescription to go fill look up you a prescription to go fill look up those side effects for yourself don't those side effects for yourself don't those side effects for yourself don't just believe what they say do the just believe what they say do the just believe what they say do the research not saying to denounce the research not saying to denounce the research not saying to denounce the medical field but having all of the medical field but having all of the medical field but having all of the resources that you need to make a resources that you need to make a resources that you need to make a conscious decision on what you're going conscious decision on what you're going conscious decision on what you're going to do to move forward for your health to do to move forward for your health to do to move forward for your health how can God get the glory if people how can God get the glory if people how can God get the glory if people don't know what you're going through if don't know what you're going through if don't know what you're going through if you're not able to share that he wastes you're not able to share that he wastes you're not able to share that he wastes nothing you know every situation every nothing you know every situation every nothing you know every situation every opportunity is a life lesson for you if opportunity is a life lesson for you if opportunity is a life lesson for you if you're open if you're open to it um to you're open if you're open to it um to you're open if you're open to it um to receive it and um you know I'm happy to receive it and um you know I'm happy to receive it and um you know I'm happy to say I'm cancer free as today and October say I'm cancer free as today and October say I'm cancer free as today and October is a month that means a lot to me so is a month that means a lot to me so is a month that means a lot to me so that way I can share my story that I can that way I can share my story that I can that way I can share my story that I can touch people um and whenever I'm getting touch people um and whenever I'm getting touch people um and whenever I'm getting teary um whenever I'm invited to share

teary um whenever I'm invited to share teary um whenever I'm invited to share my story I know that there's somebody my story I know that there's somebody my story I know that there's somebody that can be